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Movie Reviews by Todd Wofford— Funny, informative movie reviews

Todd Wofford

760 articles published

The Latest

Eternals (2021)::rating::3::rating::3::rating::3

Compared to the twenty five movies that came before it, Eternals occupies the most distant orbit in Marvel's sprawling cinematic galaxy. We only hear a few references to Thanos and the Avengers, and even those feel wedged in by obligated screenwriters. This narrative independence means that Eternals can be judged largely on its…

ByTodd WoffordNovember 11, 20210Comments

Eternals (2021) *spoilers::rating::0

Our discussion of Marvel’s Eternals was planned to be a mini-episode, but it turns out that each of us had a lot to say. So, we present you a full episode discussing the MCU’s latest offering. Spoilers abound, so do proceed with caution. This film is only in theaters, so if you haven’t seen it, do…

ByTodd WoffordNovember 10, 20210Comments

The Latest

Old (2021)::rating::1.5

It's fitting that M. Night Shyamalan based Old on a graphic novel entitled Sandcastle, as he builds the movie on an intriguing idea, only to spend 108 minutes letting it wash out to sea. And don't get it twisted: I've enjoyed Shyamalan's best work, and I really wanted to add this one to…

ByTodd WoffordNovember 6, 20210Comments

The Latest

Halloween Kills (2021)::rating::2

At the top of this review, I'm gonna need a little clarification: That 2018 Halloween--was it a soft reboot, a hard reset, a decent retread, or a spicy goulash that somehow combined all of the above? I do remember that David Gordon Green's version chucked all those umpteen sequels down the disposal and…

ByTodd WoffordNovember 4, 20210Comments

Laughable The Archive

Thirteen Ghosts (2001)::rating::2

You know you're in trouble when a movie's stylized title (Thir13en Ghosts) hurts your brain to process. Most of what follows is cacophonous and incoherent to the point of distraction. Like a Vegas casino, the plot of this film seems designed to get you lost: It takes place within a haunted house,…

ByTodd WoffordNovember 3, 20210Comments

The Archive

Fright Night (1985)::rating::4

Fright Night feels like a valentine, gift-wrapped in Halloween colors. Horror aficionados will revel in it, especially fans of the Lugosi-Karloff era. Everyone else can bask in the cozy glow of 80s nostalgia, replete with froofy hairdos and cheeseball one-liners. Few scary movies have ever provoked so much weightless joy. The story opens somewhere within…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 28, 20210Comments

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Dune (2021)::rating::3.5

Dune viewers will likely fall into one of two categories: The first are rabid devotees of Frank Herbert's epic novel, who've been frothing for a definitive cinematic adaptation. In the second group, you'll have...well, everybody else. For all my geekiness, I've never picked up Herbert's beloved book. I can't really explain…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 23, 20210Comments

Greatest The Archive

Aliens (1986)::rating::4.5

Aliens pulls off a unique feat in cinema history: With this sequel, James Cameron delivers a brawny masterwork that completely reorients the franchise, without distracting from the landmark film that preceded it. Ridley Scott's Alien had been a brilliant mind-screw that somehow delivered claustrophobic horror amidst the boggling expanse of space. Here,…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 19, 20210Comments

The Archive

Escape Room: Tournament of Champions (2021)::rating::3

Yes, Escape Room: Tournament of Champions is dumber than a box of sheetrock screws. And yes, it's pretty much the reheated leftovers of the first Escape Room. Yet, for reasons I can't fully articulate, I found myself entertained by it. Trust me, I'm as frightened as you are. I guess sometimes…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 18, 20210Comments

The Archive

Tremors (1990)::rating::3.5

Look beneath the gloriously goofy shenanigans in Tremors, and you'll find an undercurrent of pure innovation. After all, this film pioneered the freewheeling wackiness of horror-comedies like Shaun of the Dead and Tucker and Dale vs. Evil. Here, the filmmakers exact a careful balance of savvy and stupid, funny and frightening, and the…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 13, 20210Comments