The Upside (2018)::rating::2.5::rating::2.5::rating::2.5

As a young dweeb, I found great joy in flipping to the "How to Increase Your Word Power" Section of a Reader's Digest. It's truly an invaluable tool for infusing your vernacular with big, flowery words that make people roll their eyes and walk away from you at parties. I remember being struck by how many…

ByTodd WoffordJanuary 11, 20190Comments

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Roma (2018)::rating::5

In Roma, Alfonso Cuarón's camera often pans languidly across a scene, like a mind wandering into its own corners. Cuarón's vivid recollections of childhood rise like a slow swell of water, from the gentle lapping of drainwater that opens the film to the pounding ocean waves in its final act. If a river can reshape the…

ByTodd WoffordJanuary 4, 20192Comments

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Eighth Grade (2018)::rating::4.5

Between the age of twelve and eventual adulthood lies a gaping, treacherous chasm, filled with the wilderness of puberty. Hormones rage, bullies reign, and our once-beloved parents become pariahs. Not surprisingly, most movies approach this awkward time of life awkwardly: Actual teen issues of anxiety, depression, and burgeoning sexuality are difficult and three-dimensional, so it's…

ByTodd WoffordJanuary 3, 20192Comments

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They Shall Not Grow Old (2018)::rating::5

The old saying goes that, "war is long periods of tedium punctuated by moments of sheer terror." No film in recent memory captures that contrast with more crystalline ferocity than They Shall Not Grow Old. In the hands of Peter Jackson, this documentary never feels like a simple remastering or a coloring of the past with crayons. Instead, Jackson…

ByTodd WoffordDecember 28, 20181Comment

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Vice (2018)::rating::3.5

When offered the vice presidency, Daniel Webster was succinct: "I do not propose to be buried until I am dead." Vice, Adam McKay's scorching dramedy, posits that Dick Cheney took a cold, clinical look at the same office and saw boundless opportunities. McKay spends over two hours skewering Cheney on a spit, placing many of…

ByTodd WoffordDecember 27, 20180Comments

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Bumblebee (2018)::rating::3.5

Bumblebee makes a wise move by chucking the mechanical three-ring circus of past Transformers films into the dumpster. In place of all that clunking cacophony we get something surprising: A fun, patiently-paced film, filled with characters who do more than run, scream, and hide. This is a prequel that feels more like a rejuvenation. It's 1987, and…

ByTodd WoffordDecember 23, 20180Comments

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Aquaman (2018)::rating::3.5

Aquaman takes 100 minutes worth of rollicking escapism and dilutes it into 145 minutes worth of movie. At some point, all the subplots and flashbacks and supporting characters and mythic beasts and sweeping aquatic battles amount to an overpacked suitcase, with the filmmakers sitting on it to get the latches shut. Jason Momoa is great…

ByTodd WoffordDecember 21, 20181Comment

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Mary Poppins Returns (2018)::rating::3.5

For the past few weeks, I've scowled at the sight of every Mary Poppins Returns poster. My inner monologue boiled with cynicism: Hey, cool! Remember when they made Revenge of Citizen Kane? Or Return to the Bridge on the River Kwai? Nope. 'Cause they used to know enough to leave perfection alone. Mary Poppins is one those movies…

ByTodd WoffordDecember 20, 20180Comments

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Mortal Engines (2018)::rating::2.5

The makers of Mortal Engines clearly went to great lengths to render a fully three-dimensional world, only to populate it with two-dimensional characters. This is perfectly embodied in a scene where the two protagonists sit breathlessly after a narrow escape. "That was close!" One of them gasps. "Yeah," says the other. "Too close!" Millions of dollars are…

ByTodd WoffordDecember 19, 20181Comment

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The Favourite (2018)::rating::5

"We breed wars," Eleanor of Aquitaine says in The Lion in Winter. "We carry it like syphilis inside. Dead bodies rot in field and stream because the living ones are rotten." The Favourite depicts a world of war, high taxes, and pervasive poverty, all while an absentminded queen sits dazed on the throne. This movie's most surprising…

ByTodd WoffordDecember 19, 20182Comments