The Crow (1994)::rating::3.5::rating::3.5::rating::3.5

T he Crow will be forever defined by the tragedy that occured during its production. On March 31st, 1993, star Brandon Lee was shot and killed on the set, the result of a mishandled prop gun. The film was around 80% complete, so the work was finished with the help of stunt doubles, crafty editing, and…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 31, 20230Comments

Laughable The Podcast

Fright Night Part 2 (1988)::rating::2

A nyone crafting a paper on the uselessness of movie sequels could cite Fright Night Part 2 as a prime example. It xeroxes the most generic traits of the first film, but loses all the humor and charm in the translation. What's left is an exhausted, bankrupt movie: Competent makeup and special effects serve a lazy…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 25, 20230Comments

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Poltergeist (1982)::rating::4

P oltergeist represents a perfect symbiosis of Hollywood production values and the freewheeling imagination of 80s shoestring horror: When a steak cooks itself on a kitchen counter, or a dude peels the skin from his face, that's the work of Lucasfilm's Industrial Light and Magic. The lilting, majestic strings on the soundtrack are conducted by Oscar-winner…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 18, 20230Comments

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Mission: Impossible — Dead Reckoning Part One (2023)::rating::4

S even movies in, the Mission: Impossible franchise has officially overtaken the 007 series for audacious, indulgent action spectacle. Of course, they'll never match the quantity of Bond films (unless Tom Cruise decides to live another forty years), but their quality is now the gold-standard for burly, brainy tentpole flicks. Also unmatched is Cruise's steely, batshit resolve…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 13, 20230Comments

The Archive The Podcast

Friday the 13th (1980)::rating::3

A s with many other influential movies, Friday the 13th carries the weight of everything it has inspired: We're talking sequels, a prequel series, reboots, and retcons, ripoffs, and rehashes. Along that journey, Jason Voorhees has been to Hell, Manhattan, Elm Street, and outer space. You can also spot obvious homages within the Scream and Scary Movie franchises. All that…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 11, 20230Comments

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem (2023)::rating::4

I can't decide if I'm the best person to write this review, or the worst. As a plucky young child, I saw the original Ninja Turtles flicks in the theater and rented them on video. The NES video game was my favorite to rent at Showbiz Video--even if it was hard as hell. (Yes, kids--I can…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 6, 20230Comments

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RoboCop (1987)::rating::4

I ronically, sci-fi movies offer a fascinating time capsule, a snapshot to the future we once anticipated. In particular, 80s flicks looked to the horizon and saw an ugly world, slathered with graffiti and rife with the corruption of millionaires and billionaires. They were cautionary tales, high-tech parables about how the crass consumerism and disposable…

ByTodd WoffordOctober 4, 20230Comments

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Dredd (2012)::rating::4

A s with its main character, Dredd moves at a breakneck pace. For 95 minutes, we bound from one bloody, explosive action scene to the next, until the kinetic force of the film almost grows exhausting. Amazingly, Dredd manages to sneak in meaningful exposition and ambitious points about the dangers of instant judgment. The result is…

ByTodd WoffordSeptember 26, 20230Comments

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Battle Royale (2000)::rating::3

I t's no surprise Quentin Tarantino named Battle Royale as his favorite movie released since 2000. Brazen, brilliant, and unabashedly frenetic, this film feels like a cinematic cousin to his own oeuvre. And much like QT, the makers behind Royale pull from countless influences to create something new and weirdly beautiful: The savagery of Lord of the…

ByTodd WoffordSeptember 20, 20230Comments

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The Last Voyage of the Demeter (2023)::rating::2.5

T he Last Voyage of the Demeter offers a mild dose of entertainment, provided you can accept two conditions: It is only one leg of a larger voyage, and both the origin and destination are far more compelling. As such, this tidbit will offer you little to care about. If you’re down…

ByTodd WoffordSeptember 18, 20230Comments