Fast X (2023)::rating::2::rating::2::rating::2

S ometime during the previous Fast movie, a revelation dawned on me: These movies defy criticism. They flip a giddy middle finger to any intelligent analysis. After all, that installment had Luda and Tyrese launching into space aboard a rocket-mounted Pinto. The franchise didn't just jump the shark. It soared above all the sharks on the…

ByTodd WoffordJune 11, 20230Comments

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Rambo III (1988)::rating::3

F or the space of this review, you and I will venture back to a different place and time--America, in the 1980s. At this point, pop culture was a fever dream, fueled by Columbian coca plants and cheap hairspray. This was an era of plastic patriotism and dumb action movies, both of which hit their…

ByTodd WoffordJune 8, 20230Comments

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John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023)::rating::4.5

J ohn Wick Chapter 4 makes it hard to believe this franchise once started with a modest, well-tailored revenge flick. Since then, the series has added more brawn and balls to each entry, all in the commendable hopes of giving you more Wick for your ticket. Now, part four delivers a full-blown epic, a frenzied…

ByTodd WoffordJune 2, 20230Comments

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Days of Thunder (1990)::rating::3

D ays of Thunder has the engine of an old B-movie and the chassis of an expensive summer blockbuster. The result is a strange hybrid--a cacophonous soap opera on wheels. Thunder is a beautiful disaster, in which stilted dialogue and melodramatic story beats swirl by in a visual poem of twisted, smoking wreckage. After thirty years,…

ByTodd WoffordMay 31, 20230Comments

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Air (2023)::rating::3.5

T he world didn't need a bantamweight drama about the creation of a shoe, but here we are anyway. Of course, the Air Jordan isn't just a shoe. It's the shoe. And Air wisely uses that iconic sneaker to leap into a larger and more ambitious story, on how Jordan and a few corporate warriors at Nike leveraged his…

ByTodd WoffordMay 26, 20230Comments

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Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991)::rating::4

Despite its blockbuster pedigree, releasing Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves was an unsung act of bravery. It was grittier and grimier than Robin Hood movie ever made. Previous adaptations made being the lovable rogue look like fun. Costner's take is angrier, edgier, and fueled by revenge. Hell, the whole production is one boob or F-bomb away from an…

ByTodd WoffordMay 24, 20230Comments

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The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023)::rating::3

I t's shocking that Super Mario Bros. arrived nearly forty years ago, and we're just now getting a respectable film adaptation. After all, Mario is the most iconic video game figure in history, and the most recognizable cartoon character this side of Mickey and Bugs. Sure, Hollywood attempted a live-action take back in the 90s, but…

ByTodd WoffordMay 21, 20230Comments

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Knock at the Cabin (2023)::rating::2.5

M ost of M. Night Shyamalan's output since Unbreakable has amounted to the cinematic equivalent of a wet willie. The bad thing is most of these movies have actually been about three-fourths good: Shyamalan will often dupe us with a fascinating-if-flawed premise, charged with the alternating current of moving character beats and genuinely chilling atmospherics. Then,…

ByTodd WoffordMay 16, 20230Comments

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Renfield (2023)::rating::2.5

R enfield is a lean, dumb sitcom of a movie, built on an irresistible idea: Take Bram Stoker's titular character, Count Dracula's fanatical bug-munching toady, and rework him for modern times. Put simply, this Renfield is a long-suffering sycophant, shackled to a toxic relationship with his narcissistic, gaslighting boss. The filmmakers riff on that premise…

ByTodd WoffordMay 12, 20230Comments

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Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023)::rating::3.5

I f you're gonna make a movie out of a nerd-porn tabletop game, this is probably the way to do it. Honor Among Thieves never concerns itself with character classes, hit points, or will saves. Instead, we get a rollicking lark of a movie, stocked with quippy ragamuffins who do everything but wink at the…

ByTodd WoffordMay 4, 20230Comments