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Movie Reviews by Todd Wofford— Funny, informative movie reviews

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Apr 2022

Morbius (2022)::rating::1::rating::1::rating::1

M orbius achieves a rare double feat: Over the course of its punishing 104 minutes, Daniel Espinosa's middling, piddling vampire epic manages to be glum, but without any dramatic heft. At…

Feb 2022

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Infinite (2022)::rating::1

As is, Infinite is just loud, talky, and boring. Just like its titular logo, this movie seems to never end.

Jan 2022

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Thunder Force (2021)::rating::0.5

I can't say when it happened, but at some point during Thunder Force, my soul left my body. To be clear, we aren't talking about some transcendent spiritual experience. No,…

Dec 2021

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Venom: Let There Be Carnage (2021)::rating::2

This film is better than its predecessor, but making anything worse than Venom would’ve been a challenge that probably requires a deal with Satan.

Nov 2021

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After We Fell (2021)::rating::0.5

After three horrifying After movies, I'll go ahead and say it: Nothing about any of this saga is romantic. If anything, these ugly, miserable, pedantic stories represent an…

Nov 2021

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Thirteen Ghosts (2001)::rating::2

You know you're in trouble when a movie's stylized title (Thir13en Ghosts) hurts your brain to process. Most of what follows is cacophonous and incoherent to the point of…

Sep 2021

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Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard (2021)::rating::2

Plenty of movies have done this kind of thing better, I’ve can’t think of them right now. The combination of booze and bad movies makes Toddy a dull boy.

Aug 2021

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Honey, We Shrunk Ourselves (1997)::rating::1.5

By 1997, Rick Moranis was at a crossroads in his life. His wife, Ann Belsky, had passed away in 1991, thus making Moranis a young widower with two kids at…

Jun 2021

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The Misfits (2021)::rating::1.5

It only took 125 years of moviemaking, but The Misfits has finally given us the cinematic equivalent of a wet willie. That might sound a smidge dramatic, but after…

Apr 2021

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Vanquish (2021)::rating::0.5

Vanquish looks like it was funded with somebody’s allowance money. And if that were the case, if a bunch of plucky ragamuffins actually cobbled their lunch money to make…

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